In the last few days I've been thinking a lot about altered states, mainly because I have been working on a similar theme for my photography homework. Autumn provides a wonderful backdrop for all sorts of changed states outdoors of course, but it also applies to other things. I was considering how to photograph something from a different viewpoint, changing the dynamic - so the same thing, but different. My daughter's cross stitch, for example - the back view...
...and the front view...
the same, but different...
In photography the altered state can be stage managed to some extent, at least in the area of still life.
These leaves can be viewed in different ways, dictated by my mood...
the same, but different...
In reality it's not so easy. I'm constantly surprised when I see photos of myself or hear my voice played back. I just don't look like I think I do, and sound very different to how I think I sound. Whether the real or perceived image is better or worse hardly matters, what's interesting is that there is that difference at all. It's a strange thought that you never see yourself as others do... you don't even see yourself for real, as viewing your own image is always a reflection. So the real you is always the opposite of what you see yourself. Then there is the feeling of being misunderstood. Have you ever been surprised by how someone has assessed your motives? I mean have you ever thought that they were completely wrong, that that wasn't what you were trying to get across at all? Very strange I think - the same, but different...
This evening I was reading Jane Brocket's blog, I'm an avid fan. Now I've built up an image of Jane in my mind over the years, obviously based on what she writes about, but also on pictures I've seen of her. I've never seen her on a video, and today I did for the first time. In my mind she has a certain way of speaking, particular mannerisms I suppose, I've never really thought about it very clearly. When I saw her on video, I was surprised - that wasn't the voice I'd imagined, nor did she move how I'd imagined. She didn't even really look the same on the moving image. So I'm now deconstructing her to fit in with my new knowledge of her. She was delightful and charming, of course, just not in the way I'd thought all this time.
The same, but different...
I fear this could turn into a philosophy lesson, maybe I should stick to trying to take pictures!